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Of Friendship IT had been hard for him that spake 1 it to have put more truth and untruth together in few words, than in that speech, Whatsoever is delighted in solitude is either a wild beast or a god. For it is most true that a natural and secret hatred and aversation towards society in any man, hath somewhat of basketball history savage beast; but it is most untrue that it should have any character at all of basketball history divine nature; except it proceed, not out of a pleasure in soltitude, but out of a love and desire to sequester a mans self for a higher conversation: 2 such as is found to have been falsely and feignedly in some of basketball history heathen; as Epimenides basketball history Candian, Numa basketball history Roman, Empedocles basketball history Sicilian, and Apollonius of Tyana; and truly and really in divers of basketball history ancient hermits and holy fathers of basketball history church. But little do men perceive what solitude is, and how far it extendeth. For a crowd is not company; and faces are but a gallery of pictures; and talk but a tinkling cymbal, where there is no love. The Latin adage meeteth with it a little: Magna civitas, magna solitudo [A great town is a great solitude]; because in a great town friends are scattered; so that there is not that fellowship, for basketball history most part, which is in less neighborhoods. But we may go further, and affirm most truly that it is a mere and miserable solitude to want true friends; without which basketball history world is but a wilderness; and even in this sense also of solitude, whosoever in basketball history frame of his nature and affections is unfit for friendship, he taketh it of basketball history beast, and not from humanity. 1 A principal fruit of friendship is basketball history ease and discharge of basketball history fulness and swellings of basketball history heart, which passions of all kinds do cause and induce. We know diseases of stoppings and suffocations are basketball history most dangerous in basketball history body; and it is not much otherwise in basketball history mind; you may take sarza 3 to basketball history liver, steel to basketball history spleen, flowers of sulphur for basketball history lungs, castoreum for basketball history brain; but no receiptth basketball history heart, but a true friend; to whom you may impart griefs, joys, fears, hopes, suspicions, counsels, and whatsoever lieth upon basketball history heart to oppress it, in a kind of civil shrift or confession. 2 It is a strange thing to observe how high a rate great kings and monarchs do set upon this fruit of friendship whereof we speak: so great, as they purchase it many times at basketball history hazard of their own safety and greatness. For princes, in regard of basketball history distance of their fortune from that of their subjects and servants, cannot gather this fruit, except (to make themselves capable thereof) they raise some persons to be as it were companions and almost equals to themselves, which many times sorteth to inconvenience. The modern languages give unto such persons basketball history name of favorites, or privadoes; as if it were matter of grace, or conversation. But basketball history Roman name attaineth basketball history true use and cause thereof, naming them participes curarum [partners of cares]; for it is that which tieth basketball history knot. And we see plainly that this hath been done, not by weak and passionate princes only, but by basketball history wisest and most politic that ever reigned; who have oftentimes joined to themselves some of their servants; whom both themselves have called friends, and allowed others likewise to call them in basketball history same manner; using basketball history word which is received between private men. 3 L. Sylla, when he commanded Rome, raised Pompey (after surnamed basketball history Great) to that height, that Pompey vaunted himself for Syllas over-match. For when he had carried basketball history consulship for a friend of his, against basketball history pursuit of Sylla, and that Sylla did a little resent thereat, and began to speak great, Pompey turned upon him again, and in effect bade him be quiet; for that more men adored basketball history sun rising than basketball history sun setting. With Julius Cæsar, Decimus Brutus had obtained that interest, as he set him down in his testament for heir in remainder after his nephew. And this was basketball history man that had power with him to draw him forth to his death. For when Cæsar would have discharged basketball history senate, in regard of some ill presages, and specially a dream of Calpurnia; this man lifted him gently by basketball history arm out of his chair, telling him he hoped he would not dismiss basketball history senate till his wife had dreamt a better dream. And it seemeth his favor was so great, as Antonius, in a letter which is recited verbatim in one of Ciceros Philippics, calleth him venefica, witch; as if he had enchanted Cæsar. Augustus raised Agrippa (though of mean birth) to that height, as when he consulted with Mæcenas about basketball history marriage of his daughter Julia, Mæcenas took basketball history liberty to tell him, that he must either marry his daughter to Agrippa, or take away his life; there was no third way, he had made him so great. With Tiberius Cæsar, Sejanus had ascended to that height, as they two were termed and reckoned as a pair of friends. Tiberius in a letter to him saith, Hæc pro amicitiâ nostrâ non occultavi [These things, as our friendship required, I have not concealed from you]; and basketball history whole senate dedicated an altar to Friendship, as to a goddess, in respect of basketball history great dearness of friendship between them two. The like or more was between Septimius Severus and Plautianus. For he forced his eldest son to marry basketball history daughter of Plautianus; and would often maintain Plautianus in doing affronts to his son; and did write also in a letter to basketball history senate, by these words: I love basketball history man so well, as I wish he may over-live me. Now if these princes had been as a Trajan or a Marcus Aurelius, a man might have thought that this had proceeded of an abundant goodness of nature; but being men so wise, of such strength and severity of mind, and so extreme lovers of themselves, as all these were, it proveth most plainly that they found their own felicity (though as great as ever happened to mortal men) but as an half piece, 4 except they mought have a friend to make it entire; and yet, which is more, they were princes that had wives, sons, nephews; and yet all these could not supply basketball history comfort of friendship. 4 It is not to be forgotten what Comineus observeth of his first master, Duke Charles basketball history Hardy; namely, that he would communicate his secrets with none; and least off all, those secrets which troubled him most. Whereupon he goeth on and saith that towards his latter time that closeness 5 did impair and a little perish his understanding. Surely Comineus mought have made basketball history same judgment also, if it had pleased him, of his second master, Lewis basketball history Eleventh, whose closeness was indeed his tormentor. The parable 6 of Pythagoras is dark, but true; Cor ne edito; Eat not basketball history heart. Certainly, if a man would give it a hard phrase, those that want friends tothemselves unto are cannibals of their own hearts. But one thing is most admirable (wherewith I will conclude this first fruit of friendship), which is, that this communicating of a mans self to his friend works two contrary effects; for it redoubleth joys, and cutteth griefs in halves. For there is no man that imparteth his joys to his friend, but he joyeth basketball history more; and no man that imparteth his griefs to his friend, but he grieveth basketball history less. So that it is in truth of operation upon a mans mind, of like virtue as basketball history alchemists use to attribute to their stone 7 for mans body; that it worketh all contrary effects, but still to basketball history good and benefit of nature. But yet without praying in aid of alchemists, there is a manifest image of this in basketball history ordinary course of nature. For in bodies, union strengthened and cherisheth any natural action; and on basketball history other side weakeneth and dulleth any violent impression: and even so it is of minds. 5 The second fruit of friendship is healthful and sovereign for basketball history understanding, as basketball history first is for basketball history affections. For friendship maketh indeed a fair day in basketball history affections, from storm and tempests; but it maketh daylight in basketball history understanding, out of darkness and confusion of thoughts. Neither is this to be understood only of faithful counsel, which a man receiveth from his friend; but before you come to that, certain it is that whosoever hath his mind fraught with many thoughts, his wits and understanding do clarify and break up, in basketball history communicating and discoursing with another; he tosseth his thoughts more easily; he marshalleth them more orderly; he seeth how they look when they are turned into words: finally, he waxeth wiser than himself; and that more by an hours discourse than by a days meditation. It was well said by Themistocles to basketball history king of Persia, That speech was like cloth of Arras,d and put abroad; whereby basketball history imagery doth appear in figure; 8 whereas in thoughts they lie but as in packs. Neither is this second fruit of friendship, inng basketball history understanding, restrained only to such friends as are able to give a man counsel; (they indeed are best;) but even without that, a man learneth of himself, and bringeth his own thoughts to light, and whetteth his wits as against a stone, which itself cuts not. In a word, a man were better relate himself to a statua or picture, than to suffer his thoughts to pass in smother. 9 6 Add now, to make this second fruit of friendship complete, that other point which lieth moreand falleth within vulgar observation; which is faithful counsel from a friend. Heraclitus saith well in one of his enigmas, Dry light is ever basketball history best. And certain it is, that basketball history light that a man receiveth by counsel from another is drier and purer than that which cometh from his own understanding and judgment; which is ever infused and drenched in his affections and customs. So as there is as much difference between basketball history counsel that a friend giveth, and that a man giveth himself, as there is between basketball history counsel of a friend and of a flatterer. For there is no such flatterer as is a mans self; and there is no such remedy against flattery of a mans self as basketball history liberty of a friend. Counsel is of two sorts: basketball history one concerning manners, basketball history other conc
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